Is this what I really want?

I sat on the bus this morning thinking about all my assignments, my work, varsity life etc and I wondered, is this really what I wanted?

Ok sure, I've kind of made a name for myself... I made a few fuck-ups (and a REALLY BIG one) but I think I've accomplished quite a bit... I have a job lined up at the end of the year (ok ok a three month contract, but I'm gonna work my ass off to stay there) and my journo course is almost over...

I'm not sure if its just me, but it seems everyone in my class is little bored by our classes... well except for edit and design :) Its the highlight of my week... I think it's because the kind of writing and the way I done things during my internship is so different... even some of the things our lecturers are teaching us is completely different... Maybe its because they are stuck in some kind of limbo and believe that journalism is the same from when they were journalists...

But I need to make one thing clear... I don't identify myself as a journalist... I don't really enjoy it that much... I like writing blogs, profiles, reviews shit like that but for some reason, this just isn't cutting out for me... maybe its just me being out of the work environment...

I realised this morning, while reading a book on murderers and suspects, that my passion for forensics is shooting back at me... unfortunately I can't study anything in forensics since my science mark is too low... #FML

But I think once my course is over, I think I should find a place that will offer a course in criminology, detective work anything in that sort of field... maybe I should enroll in the Police Academy and work my way up... 

As much as I love writing, I can't refuse my gut, my heart and my focus... I am meant to help people and I know by doing the work I am currently doing, I won't help a single soul...

Mr Lovelace out...