The Bee and the Black Rose

I’m sitting on my bed just thinking

How you said you’d be my shoulder when resting

I sit in anger with rage infecting

How you lied when I when I spent time spending

Before I met you, I was complacent

A wall so strong, so tall and gallant

Now I lie in rubble, covered in dust and cement

While you move on you giant pestilent!

You see that rose that sits so high?

High above my room’s sky?

It sits in sadness, why’d you lie?

Why’d you carry on, why’d you spy?

My emotions so twisted by your lust

Left me wondering “why did I trust?”

Your foolproof planning with a book

Fills me with anger, rage and vengeance

The worst of all is I’m not the only one to have looked

But many have fallen for your artificial resplendence

The Black Rose that once was red

Now looks upon me with the greatest dread

A constant reminder that you’re a fraud

Yes I said it, thank you Lord!

Now I see that broken rose

With the greatest of respect

I’m not the only one you’ve hurt with your facist pose

Next time I see you, I’ll squash you you little insect!

It seems you have already forgotten me

Don’t think you’re a free little bee

I’m the Queen Bitch here Mr bald head

Can’t wait to sting you DEAD!

I'm a nice guy, now FUCK OFF!

I'm a nice guy... many people have told me this... and everyone knows that nice guys finish last and right now, I am sick of it...

I do a lot for people, I cook, I compliment, buy drinks, buy flowers, share chocolate, give chocolate, give attention, listen, laugh at kak jokes, smile, always polite, shoulder to cry on, speak the truth, honest, open and non-judgemental...

I am about 3cm away from not giving a total fuck for the entire human race... I will remain a nice person, but I will in fact not give a shit for anyone who dares make a pass at me... Why? BECAUSE I'M FUCKIN' SICK OF BEING THE ONE LEFT OUT IN THE RAIN!!! I'm always pushed aside, because the gigantic douchebag cunt with a six pack, who will eventually cheat/beat/lie and screw you over, is in great demand while the nice guy sits in the pouring rain...

Urgh... I'm close to reaching the point when someone sends me a "Hi you look like a nice guy, want to chat sometime?" message on Gaydar/Prodigits/Grindr etc, by answering "Hi there! :-) , yes I am a nice guy now FUCK OFF!!! because you and I both now that in a few days you're not going to be interested in me, because you saw some guy with giant dick, six pack and bad boy image... and lets be honest... even though you are looking for that "nice guy" you won't take him because 1) he doesn't have a six pack 2) you're "only looking for friends" and "may be something else" 3) you've probably lied about at least six things in you bio and 4) you don't really have a clue what your type is in the first place... and even if you are truly being sincere, you'll respond to this message anyway, because you happen to be the nice guy and that you know exactly how I feel and why I am writing this message, because it has happened to you in the past... if not THEN FUCK OFF ALREADY!!! "

And this isn't just an on-line re-occurrence... Of the few guys I've been on dates with, they've all told me to my face, "I really like you" and the next day, they are chatting up a model... thanks... let me send a postcard to my self-esteem saying "you got tossed again" and add a smiley face and a "lol" to make the message a little bit more bearable...

I'll always be the nice guy, but from now on, don't EVER expect me to treat you like a king...

Mr Love lace out...

Gay is not a synonym for paedophile!

Before I start this story, just know that this is not the first time it's happened to me...

I started using the bus again last week seeing as I'm a smidge stronger in the arms and can climb steps a bit easier. The only difference - aside form the crutches - is that I no longer sit right at the back, but rather, right in the front... I also sit on the right hand side of the bus (the part that can fit three people)...

So I'm sitting there, minding my own business listening to my mp3 player, looking out the window and generally not bothering anyone... Then this over-protective bitch (I chose bitch over the C*** because I thought it wouldn't be as harsh...)comes on the bus... There were other seats available, but she decides to sit by me... I have no objections to people sitting next to me as long as the don't bother me...

She also happened to have a little boy with her... I guesstimate his age around two... But this is what pissed me off... Instead of sitting like a normal person, she sits on the edge of the seat with her kid on her lap... I never paid much attention to it, but then the bitch kept giving me this kak look like "don't look at  my son" as if to say I'm a child molester... I felt like saying to her " gay is not a synonym for paedophile you C* - uhm Bitch"

This is the third time it has happened to me... my issue is, had I been a more macho, "straight looking" guy, or a woman, that would never have happened... I know I tend to be a bit paranoid, but this isn't paranoia talking, this is pure observation... I get that some parents are just over-protective, but why the look she gave me???

I mean, do I look like a paedophile??? I don't fuckin' think so!!! I should know what one looks like... I was molested... and I can assure you, strangers on the bus don't molest you... family or in my case family friends do the molesting... all I have to say is "Fuck you Lady"... nuff said

Mr Love lace out...

Who am I really angery at?

This is as blunt as I am going to get.

I have no idea who I am really pissed off at; me or society...

Say what you want, but looks are everything. No one will look at an average looking guy with a little bit of a weight problem, when mr hotstuff with his six pack and uber massive invisible "I'm horny" sign above his head...

Now, I'm not saying all good looking guys are think with their dick heads, but have you ever seen a guy with a great physique go out with a guy who doesn't have one?

I understand that there are many gay guys, who happen to be attractive, have great personalities and go out with other guys with just as equal great personalities, but they also happen to be hot...

Now we get the average looking guys, like me... Still have a little bit of a pimple problem, weight won't seem to go away, but I have myself to blame, as I refuse to work out or play any form of sport...

What I can say is that I am highly cultured and well-read, fantastic cook, baker, very creative, spontaneous, green thumb, wine enthusiast, open minded, more caring than the next person (ask anyone who knows me), nicest person you'll ever meet, but I won't be given a chance because I have a little too much belly flab...

Ok wait I drove off the point here, getting back to "Now we get the average looking guys..." these guys also ONLY look at the hot guys... Ok I do to, but seriously I've been rejected by not-so-good lookling, average-looking "sweet" guys, and hot guys... basically all the types of guys... Why??? Is it because I'm "cute" and not sexy, is it because I have an invisible sign that says "Desperate" above my head??? Or am I still single and seriously pissed at myself for admitting that I label people, good looking, average and below average...

If love is supposed to be blind, then when did it get cornea transplant???

Or karma being a bitch to me because I refused to give that beggar a R5...